Friday, February 28, 2020

Steps to Take When You Find Out One of Your Best Friends Is an "AlLeGeD" Sexual Predator


  1. Listen to the victims’ accounts.
  2. Get nauseous, angry, and morose simultaneously.
  3. Ask him “What the fuck”, and wait impatiently for his response.
  4. Reread the victims’ accounts, and not give a damn about what he says, because now you are recalling all of the good times you had developing a friendship, and reading the testimonies of these people he “allegedly” hurt, and are coming to the awareness that these things happened in parallel to each other throughout the years.
  5. Cry a little.
  6. Feel guilty for crying.
  7. Recollect all the warning signs that you shrugged off as “quirks”. And feel betrayed by the facade.
  8. Realize that you know some of the women, and feel like you betrayed them.
  9. Recall the time you were assaulted and had no one to help you. Recall the second time you were assaulted and you DID speak up, and it nearly cost you your job. Think, "Is this a good time to even bring this up?" And then decide not to.
  10. Cry a little more.
  11. Remember that none of this shit is about you or him. It is about his victims, and you need to  heed to what they say. Give them space if they want space. Listen to them if they want to be heard. If they want to let it all out in a flood of tears, then have some tissues ready. And for the love of everything, do better, because you obviously were slacking.
  12. Probably find a therapist, because holy shit...

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